Sean Splicer: America’s favorite reptilian press secretary’s feud against Dippin’ Dots®

Many people have been critical of Sean Spicer AKA Sean Splicer, perhaps rightfully so. It’s often the job of a White House Press Secretary to tell bold faced lies, but Splicer takes it to an insultingly patronizing level. Sean Splicer has publicly humiliated his country by proudly conveying as little information and integrity as possible during press conferences. Splicer has been the butt of many a joke, including parodied by Melissa McCarthy on Saturday Night Live. While many may view his obvious lies and seeming incompetence as comedy, his very important job is hardly a joke.

Is Sean Splicer a gene splicing reptilian?

Sean Splicer is Reptilian, and like all Reptilians Sean Splicers body was genetically engineered to allow him to shift between human and Reptilian form. Splicer displays the cold emotionless lying skills of a Reptilian and boldly lies with the best of them. Further proof of his Reptilian nature was revealed when The Washington Post uncovered Sean’s love of swallowing cinnamon gum .“Two and a half packs by noon,” Mr. Spicer told The Post. “I talked to my doctor about it, he said it’s no problem.

Why the “Hitler” comment was a meaningless media distraction.

The Splicer “holocaust-roversy” was just another media distraction in the long tattered scroll of the Reptonald administration’s distractions. America is posturing for war and yet the media makes a point to “shame” Splicer for a meaningless idiotic comment. Reptilians are a lot of things but they aren’t dunces, they’ve been genetically engineered to have higher intelligence – specifically mental prowess for social control and deception. Reptilians love the underhanded tactics of “creating controversy” attempting to steer the media away from more deserving subjects such as the abysmal approval rating of Reptonald and all his foibles and failures.

Sean Splicer is worse than an entertaining distraction.

Reptonald J. Trump recently showed his approval for the “attention” and “excitement” that Splicer has been making waves with the media. While it’s true that Sean has been given more attention than previous white house press secretaries, he’s hardly deserving of praise. Compared to the Obama era press secretary, Sean Splicer behaves like a drunken pathological liar with no media training. Frankly it’s embarrassing for America that on top of an immature wanna be despot for a president, we also have a Reptilian Buffoon to deliver our news/lies.

Sean Splicer’s war Dippin Dots®

  

Dippin’ Dots®  responds to Mr. Spicer’s public dislike of its product, calls for a truce in “Open Letter to Sean Spicer,”

We’ve seen your tweets and would like to be friends rather than foes,” wrote Scott Fischer, Dippin Dots® company’s chief executive. “After all, we believe in connecting the dots.” Mr. Fischer also offered to send the White House free Dippin’ Dots, saying the company could “afford to treat the White House and press corps to an ice cream social” promising that all of their favorite flavors could be provided. Mr. Fischer made a point to emphasize that Dippin’ Dots was a successful and growing employer based in the United States. “As you may or may not know, Dippin’ Dots are made in Kentucky by hundreds of hardworking Americans in the heartland of our great country,” he wrote. “That means we’re creating jobs and opportunities. We hear that’s on your agenda, too.”

One thought on “Sean Splicer: America’s least favorite reptilian press secretary’s feud against Dippin’ Dots®

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